Section 3 | Rule #9: Concerning the Custos’ Spirit of the Beloved

Though the Custos is to have God’s warrior spirit, he can become hardened, fatigued, and desensitized from the hardship and sufferings caused by the spiritual battle. Accompanying signs of demonic weariness are a loss of joy, impatience, contempt for others–especially those of his own family–rather than compassion for them, he perceives the divine commands as a burden, or he embraces them militaristically, but his spirituality bears the mark of legalism, repression, and the condemnation of others. If his relationship with God is as the soldier to his general exclusively, he will eventually lack charity, and attitude toward God will be like that of a mercenary.

To balance the warrior spirit, the Custos is to ask the Holy Spirit for the spirit of a lover. The spirit of the lover tempers the man of battle with compassion, tenderness, understanding, counsel and above all charity. For as the holy apostle says that among all gifts, “the greatest of these is love” (1 Cor 13:13).

To love his bride as Christ the Bridegroom loves His Church, the Custos must become one who is loved by the Bridegroom. That is, he must allow himself to receive such love. This places the man in a challenging position. By his own means, he is incapable of loving his wife in the manner that Christ loves His Church, therefore it is imperative that he humble himself as a “bride” of Christ, or a “beloved soul” of Christ, and by being loved as the beloved, he will learn how to love his beloved – his wife – as Christ loves him.

Devin Schadt | Executive Director of the Fathers of St. Joseph

Ite ad Joseph