Hard Truths Regarding Men and Women

Recently Matt Fradd had acclaimed author, scholar, philosopher and female influencer, Carrie Gress as a guest on Pints with Aquinas.
Carrie is a formidable voice for women and against feminism.

Matt asked Carrie to define the error of feminism.
Below is a summarization of her response:

Feminism is the ideology of women believing that they can live without men. Feminism convinces women that they are not be shackled to the role of being a wife, having children, being married, or having a husband. Feminism convinces women that they must be liberated from marriage, motherhood, and the family.

It is ironic.
Women who hate men often want to assume men’s roles.
But why despise that which you want to become.
Feminists believe that they can do what men do, and by doing those manly things, men are no longer needed.

Consequently men, conditioned by feminism and guilted for being men, have recoiled from their God-given role as men.
Shrinking from their identity, role and responsibility, they lack meaning value, become depressed, lonely and suicidal.
Four out of all suicides are males.

So how do men become the man women long for, and how do women become the women that men long for?
How do the two discover their ultimate identity and happiness?

Marriage is the answer.

Men and women are not meant to compete with one another but rather complete one another.

It is within marriage that men can be men by protecting, providing and being the domestic priest for the woman, and consequently enabling women to flourish.

Though men of the past may have abused their headship, and caused women to feel neglected, used and abused; nevertheless, marriage is not the problem.

Immature, narcissistic, domineering men are.

Marriage is not the problem that women should be running from.
But rather, women ought to be returning to marriage and men who will sacrifice for them.

The answer is not to delete or diminish the difference in roles and responsibilities between the man and woman/ husband and wife, but rather to define the difference, articulate it, proclaim it and live it.

Is a husband’s role and responsibility any different than his wife’s?
What did God intend?

Recall that Adam was divinely ordained to stand in the breech between the unknown, uncharted, undiscovered world and the garden—the domestic life.
Adam’s mission was to integrate these two worlds, while protecting the one—the world of his family.

You and I have the same calling: to be the guardian who stands guard at the gate of the garden, on the horizon between the competitive and hostile world and our family, to ensure that the evils of the world not contaminate them.

Adam was given the command to till and keep the garden.
The Hebrew words for “till” and “keep” are abad, that is, to cherish, and shamar, which means to protect.
Like Adam, you and I are fundamentally charged to protect woman and the child—at all costs.
This is your responsibility and mission.

There is more.
God appointed Adam as priest.
God gave Adam the command to not eat from the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
Notice that after the fall, God did not address Eve, the one who sinned first, but rather Adam—the one who was given the command first. God questioned Adam because it was his responsibility to cherish, protect, and defend his bride.

It was Adam’s responsibility to be priest who transmits the divine commands to his wife and ensure that they are upheld by sacrificing himself for that purpose.

It is important that we men understand that Eve did not even exist when God gave Adam the command to till and keep the garden.

The point is that a husband is responsible to God for the woman, and a wife is responsible to God through the man.

In a certain, qualified sense, your wife receives God’s protection, provision, priesthood (sacrificial) and power through you.
Not only do women recoil at this statement; but men, conditioned by feminism have been conditioned to resist this truth.

St. Joseph, a type of Adam, commanded by God to take his wife into his home, obediently refused to “expose Mary to shame.”
St. Joseph “shamared” Mary’s garden from the shame of the serpent, and because of this the fruit of her womb not only survived but lived to die for the salvation of mankind.

Like Joseph, it is your duty as man, father, husband, and leader to transmit the love, protection, and teachings of God to your wife and children; to stand on the horizon between the outer hostile world and your domestic church to ensure that the evil serpent doesn’t enter your home.

This is your unique, divinely ordained role…and it is different than your wife’s.